Monday, March 11, 2013

Who Do You Think I Am?



“You hypocrite! First remove the beam from your own eye, and then you will see clearly enough to remove the speck from your brother's eye." Matthew 7:5 NIV

From the time we are born, we begin building a reputation for ourselves. We are shaped by the forces of life around us, our parents and friends’ influences, and the choices we make. Along the way, we face hardships that make us think about ourselves, the kind of person we are, and the kind of person we are growing to be. Those around us are always watching, making guesses and drawing assumptions about the person they believe us to be…at least in their minds. Then we mess up, and it is easy for them to categorize us, pigeon-hole us, and weigh the sentence they will impose on our lives. For some, we are cursed by the choices we have made. We are made to live in a social dungeon, in a prison of failure. It does not matter if we repent or keep on doing stupid things; those former choices could shape the perceptions of those around us until we fold our hands in rest. 

Is that the end of the story? Or are we much deeper than they want us to be.

Smugness is easy for some. It is so much easier to believe in black in white, in a good or bad person, or a fulfilled or wasted life. It is easy to assume that we know the motives behind people’s choices, even though we have not lived their lives, or walked in their shoes, or seen the world through their eyes. How can we hope to understand them unless we search deep into our souls to find out the depths of depravity that we all may hold inside us? We are all one step away from a wasted life, a haunting choice, or an economic catastrophe that makes us destitute or even homeless. We cannot change the family we were born into, or the country in which we were raised. Circumstances and the choices of others around us can also lead us to where we are today.

Am I excusing the bad choices some of us make? Of course not.  Justice for crimes we commit is not only necessary but also required by God and society.  I am saying that compassion and reason should rule our lives. We should use Christ as our example. He even prayed for those who were literally crucifying him.  He saw the person, but did not judge them to be a lost cause or without hope. How can we not give everyone else the same courtesy that Christ gave them?

So when you look at me, do you think you know the person that lies beneath this skin? I am a person of imperfection, but with a tender heart that sees the good in others, and even in myself. I have made choices I regret and I have to live with those, but they do not shape me. They do not sentence me to an eternity of nothingness or a life of constant repentance and self-deprecation.  I must move forward. And I must not let your assessment of me shape the rest of my life.

When people reflect on me at the end of my life, many will not like what they saw. Many will think they know the person that lies beneath the soil. But only God will know that heart, and will decide if my life is worthy of resting with him. I give my life to Him and ask that he see the original choice I made to follow Him. May I only seek his approval, and leave all others to their judgments.

In the end, tears will be shed for me…tears of anger or regret or of love.  But my hope is that He will wipe all those tears away…for whatever reason they are shed. 

Feel free to leave a comment or email me directly at mcdsparks@gmail.com. 


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